I was toying with switching to something like Crazy Monkey or Monkey Puzzle – or whatever the darn online thing is called – but I’m not techie minded, it’s free use is limited and, well, to be honest I’m not comfortable with it. But, having posted my ‘Thoughts’ on my main blog for a year now, I’ve realised the posts get lost among other posts and it’s a nuisance linking to them etc, so I’ve decided to create this new, specific Thoughts From A Devonshire Farmhouse Blog. I hope you approve!
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February’s ‘Thoughts’ theme is... TRUST
I was thinking about trust the other day. How much we take trusting people or things for granted and what sort of life we’d live if we didn’t have any trust?
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| image from Pixabay |
My daughter trusts her horses, the big horses and the smaller ponies, to have good manners – not to bite or kick, to respect her presence (yes, even the almost-two-year-old colt, good manners for him are essential as he’s already well over sixteen hands high.) I trust that the dogs will not chase the hens (although Eddie does like rounding them up!) and I trust the village pub will serve delicious food (it does!).
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| Eddie |
I trust that our stone-built farmhouse will remain firm and solid no matter how hard the wind blows, that the smoke-alarms will go off if ever properly needed... There are dozens of things we automatically trust. That our car/plane/train journey will be safe – that the cab driver, train driver/airline pilot is sober, knows his/her job and will get us to our destination in one piece. (So sad that recently there have been several tragic air accidents.) That the goods we ordered from E-bay or Amazon will be what we expected. Though I’ve long since given up trusting that the delivery firm, Evri, will actually deliver to us, not some other totally different address...
I think these thoughts were spurred by the amount of abuse of trust that we tend to hear via social media or TV/radio news. Especial the recent sentencing of that evil monster who murdered those beautiful Liverpool children who were enjoying their summer dance class. All involved (except him) trusted that those girls would have a fantastic time and would come home happy, bubbling with joy and safe – no one (except him) even considered that the day would turn into the worst nightmare ever. My heart goes out to all the victims, and the officials, emergency services and such. And the judge, jury and journalists who had to listen to that horror in court.
My contempt, however, for the despicable morons who instigated the aftermath of riots through believing the rubbish stirred by irresponsible false speculation posted on social media - and ditto to the same despicable morons who were saying that the UK media (including the trustworthy BBC) immediately after that murderer’s (justified and appropriate sentencing to a minimum of fifty-two years in jail) were not reporting the truth, therefore impling cover-up conspiracy.
No the trustworthy UK press were not being truthful, and they plainly told us they weren’t for a very valid, understandable reason. Because the detail of what that monster inflicted on those innocents was too harrowing to openly report. That isn’t cover-up. It isn’t ‘conspiracy’. It’s respectful, sensitive, common sense.
We trust that parents will care for their children, that teachers, priests, politicians are trustworthy. Unfortunately this is all too often not the case. We trust that presidents, prime ministers, kings or emperors will put the people they represent before their own interests. Take the recent UK Parliamentary debate on Assisted Dying. Whether you, personally, agree or not is immaterial. As Members of Parliament representing US - not themselves - I thought too many of them voted using their own beliefs, not what was best or right for Great Britain as a whole. The 'I personally cannot back this bill because of my Faith'? Sorry, you are there to represent us, not yourself. The same goes for voting against gay rights or trans issues - personal feeling do not come into it.
Again, sadly, a lack of trust in our leaders is all too often, now, the case. In fact, I think we can assume that several leaders of various countries cannot be trusted.(Although I think King Charles III and Queen Camilla can be trusted to take their royal role seriously, with trust and honour.)
Can we trust the police? I cannot say for other countries, but here in the UK I am going to say 'yes' ... although I say so with some trepidation. On the whole the majority of coppers are decent people, there to do as good a job as they can. The bad pennies get all the media attention though. But, there are more than a few bad pennies, bullies, misogynists, racists, predators... I'm trusting that these sorts will be dealt with, that their victims have the courage to speak out, be listened to and suitable action taken. I guess we have to trust, because what is the alternative? Anarchy?
We can no longer trust social media to weed out the more absurd conspiracy theories, hate speech, nasty videos of blatant pornography or cruelty. Can no longer trust a given word as a given word... Free Speech is all well and good – everyone is entitled to their own opinion – but not when it perpetuates blatant, narcissistic, misogynistic lies, or incites hatred or hurt, that isn’t free speech. It’s ignorant spite. Why are the people who support those things so admired by so many? I don’t understand it.
What happened to the honour of a Gentleman’s Agreement or keeping faith behind a solemn-made vow, I wonder?
Did you know that back in the 1700s a business agreement was sealed (and adhered to!) in one of two ways? The more commonly known 'spit on your palm and clasp hands' and what we would now call a 'high five'?
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friends
(although maybe the cat isn't quite so sure!) |
We trust our friends. OK sometimes we disagree with each other, it happens, but real, trusting and trustworthy friends agree to disagree or soon make up, because real friendship should be sacrosanct. If it isn't then the friendship wasn't as real as it was thought.
For myself honour still means a lot. If I say I’ll do something I try my very best to ensure I do it. Loyalty, too, means a lot to me. Break that trust and I will no longer respect anything about you.
We trust our health care here in the UK. OK the NHS is in a state, but I can’t fault our hospitals here in North Devon... or at least at the moment I can’t, I’ll let you know if I feel the same after I’ve had my hip op. (No idea when, but I’m near the top of the waiting list.) That’s another ‘trust’ isn’t it? If we are ill or are unfortunate to be involved in an accident, we trust that an ambulance will come, that the Paramedics will look after us. Doesn’t always happen, alas, but if we didn’t trust we’d be in even worse trouble.
We trust the food we buy from the supermarket to be fresh and safe, though I was disappointed to inadvertently buy a bottle of milk that shouldn’t have been on the shelf because it had already reached its Use By date. I did email a complaint to the shop managers. At the time of writing this, I still haven’t had the courtesy of an apology. I trust I will? Eventually.
I was thinking also, we trust our favourite authors to write another fabulous book for us to eagerly grab and enjoy. For my part – and I think I can speak for several of my author friends – we do our best to write and produce a good story, to publish it for sale at a reasonable price, and to not let our readers down.
Things in Life do go wrong, we can’t always trust that everything will go right, but we can do our best to try to make it so. I’m reminded of that wonderful line in The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel: “If it’s not all right in the end, then it isn’t the end.”
It’s a good thing to remember.
(and I trust you’ll all be back with me next month? 😊
please leave a comment here :-)
ReplyDeleteAnother thoughtful read, Helen. I am disheartened by the misinformation that floods social media and erodes our own trust in the systems that have been (for the most part) working. The people that promote the misinformation are doing it for their own gains, and I really hope that Karma is taking notes. We all have to speak up when we see a wrong.
DeleteI'm with you there Cryssa!
DeleteA lovely morning read, Helen. Felt like I was sitting at your farmhouse kitchen table and enjoying a cuppa. Trust is such a complex and mysterious emotion - whether it's immediate or built over time, broken or questioned, it's perhaps one of our most enigmatic senses. You've done a super job of distilling the nature of it into life's events. I'll be back next month for another natter!
ReplyDeleteThanks Elizabeth, one day we really will have a chat over a cuppa together!
DeleteOn the subject of ghosts, I asked a vicar whom I sat next to at a wedding reception if he ever preformed exorcisms. He confirmed that he did. 'So, is there a good reason behind it?' I asked. 'Nearly always,' he replied. 'So you believe in ghosts?' 'No, I don't,' he said. I asked him to explain what seemed to me to be an anomaly. 'People are genuinely experiencing these things in their minds, but that doesn't make them real. The cause is nearly always a trauma. It might be a bereavement or the onset of puberty.' Interesting.
ReplyDeleteInteresting indeed. I don't think Kathy's imagining the encounters in our pub, or at home here - no trauma involved on her part. I also find it interesting that any Christian (or Catholic) person 100% believe in angels and the Holy 'Ghost' - the Resurrection appearance was, after all, very simply a ghost. If you believe in one, why not the other?
DeleteGreat post. I am shattered by the repeated breaches of trust we see on a daily, weekly, monthly basis. And as to social media, what started out as a wonderful project to allow us to communicate digitally, share opinions and thoughts, has become a cesspit of echo chambers where you best beware if you voice an opinion in the wrong forum. It has become OK to bully, belittle and harass those who disagree with you--and the biggest bully and belittler of them all has now plunked his arse into the one of the most powerful seats in the world. He inspires no trust. He has no trust--except in himself and his band of sycophant cronies who likely cannot breathe properly what with all their brown-nosing.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree Anna! I guess we need to change a familiar nautical quote from 'Trust me, I'm a pirate' to 'Trust me I'm a liar/conman/idiot...' (or add your own term!)
DeleteI only useTwatter [sic] now for marketing, Facebook and BlueSky for 'social' but I ONLY look at posts from trusted friends or other authors. I don't go anywhere near the main message pages on social media now. Such a shame.
On the other hand, maybe the next couple of months might prove interesting with the inevitable fall out between the Main Players...
Love that quote from The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.
ReplyDeleteLove that quote from The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.
ReplyDeleteIt's so good isn't it!
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