Thoughts From A Devonshire Farmhouse: APRIL 2026

THOUGHTS FROM A DEVONSHIRE FARMHOUSE

Looks good, doesn't it?
My first cosy mystery - a 'Penguin Classic'? ...

yeah right... I wish!

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April's theme In the immortal words of Monty Python:

spam, spam, spam...

(and just right for 'April Fool's (scam) day!)

That 'Penguin Classics' cover above looks good, doesn't it?

But it's fake.

A spoof made by a friend for me to make me laugh, and its reproduction is here with the consent of my © graphics designer, Cathy Helms of avalongraphics.org

A couple of weeks ago I really thought that I'd hit the jackpot and an editor from Random House, New York, USA - Penguin - really was interested in my Jan Christopher Cosy Mystery Series.

Turns out it was a really convincing scam. For what point, I'm still not sure, but I suspect it was to get hold of a PDF or even word.doc version to use ... for whatever purpose (A.I. copying?)

I'm embarrassed to have fallen for it - although right from the start my head was telling me 'This is a scam' but my heart was saying 'O.M.G. Penguin... Penguin is interested in taking my murder mystery series!!!!' (along with happy dance, thudding heart, hopes of a better bank balance blah blah...)

"It's a scam" I kept telling myself then:

"But what if it isn't???"

The sender wanted further information - what plans had I for the series, did I have an agent, was I working on another in the series?

I did check: the sender. John Freeman, does work for Random House (I looked at their website). I Googled him, he is an editor. At first glance the email address looked kosher @randomhouse ... except I ignored that it wasn't .com but aol.com. Could be his personal email I told myself.

Anyway, hoping this was real, I replied. I kept to the facts that could be found anywhere on my social media - that's the one and only bit of useful, advice I ever got from my useless ex-agent when a potential film producer contacted me. (Hah! in the very early days of the internet, before the enormity of Social Media - and scams!) He was interested in Harold The King, hoping to make a movie and wanted assistance with the script. Ex-agent said, scathingly, that these sort of enquiries rarely went anywhere, so forget it. "But what about the few that are genuine?" I countered.

She shrugged (I could hear the shrug over the telephone) "Just don't tell him anything that he can't read in the book itself."

So, good advice. Don't say anything that can't easily be found elsewhere.

(And for interest, the film producer was Robin Jacob, he's genuine, I helped write the script, and we still haven't given up on the hope of making 1066 the Movie - although we've been plugging away at it for a long time now! )

Maybe I should write our endeavours as a novel? An ecited author gets invited to be part of a movie team...I suppose I cn always include it as a future episode in my Jan Christopher Cosy Mysteries ... There you go, got the title already: A Movie Murder.

artwork by
Chris Collingwood Historical artist

Robin - on my left

Within 24 hours I had a friendly, informative reply, from 'Penguin' explaining what he wanted (to assess my books) and how impressed he was by my openness and planning for the series. He asked for more information of the next books - the Work In Progress and PDF copies of those already published to read.

My reply was that they are available on Amazon or I could send epub ARC copy (unedited) of the first two, but no, I wouldn't divulge anything about future books - except the title which will be A Matter of Murder (also public knowledge.)

At this stage (after a couple more apparently enthusiastic emails - although it was odd that he always replied prompt - and these mails were obviously AI written (although I guess we need to get used to that!) He wasn't a very busy editor though...? I thought I'd better check this out more diligently, so mailed US-based Cathy Helms - asking her to call this guy's given US phone number.

Surprise. No answer, and it was a Canadian number anyway. And she pointed out 'No publisher would use aol.com for emails.'

No, of course they wouldn't. I'd known that deep down but... to say I was terribly disappointed is an understatement. Thankfully, I hadn't sent any files. I had a good sob instead.

However, I know it was a bit more of a waste of my time, but I wanted some personal revenge, so I mailed back (equally enthusiastically) saying, as I had a good friend who worked in New York, not far from the Random House offices, (ha! I can also lie!) he's offered to use his paperback copies of the first two in the series - "so they're waiting for you at your reception - I thought the actual books would be far better for you to read. Do enjoy them!"

No reply. I followed up with "I do hope you picked up your package, John."

How strange. I didn't get a reply to that either.

Oh dear - is 'he' disappointed that his cruel trick didn't work?

a great pity that my cosy mysteries are set in the 1970s, before the Internet,

otherwise I'd happily murder someone...

I - and I think several other authors - are receiving so much scam spam lately, all supposedly being from 'interested book clubs'. They all say, more-or-less the same thing 'I noticed your book - I'd like to promote it'.

IF I am inclined I email back with "Which ONE of my many books are you scamming me about?"

Recent ones have been from 'book promotion magazine clubs' (over 900 members!). As example: I ask "How much do you charge?" The emphatic reply, "No charge, I just like helping authors, shall I send you the list of what we require to promote you?"

"Ok. Yes please."

The list came through - book cover, book trailer, marketing graphic, author bio etc willberequired.

I replied that my graphics designer could provide all that ...

er... no.

Apparently they require a high standard so they do all the designing. At a cost of several hundred $.

What a surprise! :-)

Then there are the "I loved your book" [note singular... which one?] "I tried leaving a review on Amazon but couldn't" [why not?] "Can I have your permission to leave a review on Goodreads?"

Why do you need permission to leave a review? Just write one!

I reply: "Thank you, how kind."

Usually within half-an-hor I get "I've left a review" (and a copy of it)

Again I just say Thank You.

Almost by return comes a "I've noticed your book isn't doing well on Amazon, I would like to help you promote it."

I bet you would! [And might I ask: why couldn't you leave the review on Amazon? Oh? Because you're a fraud and you're barred?]

So, these things ARE scams. If you want to promote your book, go to one of the genuine Book Tour organisers, like the ones I helppromote:

The Coffee Pot Book Club

https://www.thecoffeepotbookclub.com/author-services/

and

Yarde Book Reviews & Book Promotion

Mary Anne Yarde:

https://maryanneyarde.blogspot.com/p/price-list.html

Rachel's Random Resources

https://www.rachelsrandomresources.com/for-authors

There are others - but if they aren't open and up-front with what they charge - hit the delete and block button!

Not quite the same as e-mail spamming, but same sentiment!

And in our UK news recently there are some companies being looked into for posting fake reviews. Amazon had that problem a while ago - the drawback was, they sorted the fakes but loads of genuines were removed or also blocked.

I think our major problem is that we are all getting FAR too complacent with accepting Fake News. A certain US person is always doing it, almost everything he says is fake, or twisted, or exaggerated - unless it's news he doesn't like (usually about himself) in which case he brands it as fake. According to him, essential vaccination are a con, as is climate change. And now with A.I it's getting harder and harder to differentiate between what is factual and what isn't. (And tobe balanced, our Nigel Farage is as bad.)

I confess I have, recently, been spreading my own fake unfact. My apologies. It wasn't intentional, possibly subconscious wishful thinking.

I'm not 72 this coming birthday in April, I'm 73.

I think.

Goodbye until next month

safe spamming!

lege feliciter (read happily)